I was talking to my psychologist last Thursday, and we got on the subject of black women. I was telling him about the problems that I have had with many black women throughout my life, as well as how I was treated by them. I also got to talking to him about Ralph Richard Banks, the black man who went on national television advocating for black women to marry white men. I told him my feelings on the matter; that I totally disagreed with what that man was doing. The reply that I got from my psychologist was very surprising.
He said, that he actually agreed with many black women dating and marrying white men. When I asked him why, he said something that tripped me out. He said because maybe that might take some of the evil out of many of them. He went on to say, that something that he has always noticed, is that black women seem to treat white men better, for some strange reason. When he said that, it tripped me the hell out; because it’s the same thing that many black men have been noticing about black women for quite some time now. Now, keep in mind, I have never talked to this dude before in my life before I started seeing him.
Yet, this cat NOTICED exactly the same thing, that I, and many other black men, have noticed about many black women who date non-black men. Hell, I noticed the same thing that he did years ago before I even knew this man existed. We notice that black women treat non-black men a helluva lot better than they treat their own. In fact, it seems like the only time that I even see many black women smile out here PERIOD, is when A.) They are lugging around a damn mulatto baby, and they are literally GUSHING over it for the whole damn world to see. Or, B.) They are with a non-black man out here. Otherwise, if you are a regular black man who sees a black woman passing by out here, ALONE, she will have a scowl on her face that’s meaner than the damn Grinch whole stole Christmas towards you.
It will only change for you, a black man, if she finds you EXTREMELY attractive. Or, if she thinks that you have money. Otherwise, you will be the recipient of constant avoidance routines, or mean-mugs and scowls. It’s the truth. He also went on to talk about how when he first started his practice, how the majority of the people that he saw coming into his office were black women with white men. He said that even though many of the white men that were with the black women that he saw were attractive, they seemed to always have some type of damn issue. Basically, these white men were as WORTHLESS as they claimed niggas to be.
Many of them wouldn’t work, or they would only work jobs that paid low-wages–so the woman would have to take care of them. Many of them laid around the damn house, and wouldn’t do a damn thing whatsoever. He went on to tell me about how many of these women would always threaten to leave these men. However, they NEVER would. One of the black women, that he was seeing, stuck with her trifling white husband for over twenty damn years!! The reason being, is because they saw no other alternative. I mean Heaven forbid, that they would have to look a black man’s way again. Therefore, they stayed with white men who turned about to be as WORTHLESS as they claimed black men were.
I don’t know what it is about black women, but it’s something about many of them that causes men to see them as mother figures; and I blame black women for that. The problem with black women, is that too damn many of them are MATRIARCHAL. They want to run everything, and what ends up happening, is that the men that they are with, in many cases, give the hell up, and stop trying to be a man; since many black women are INSISTENT on being the damn head of everything.
They can’t say it’s just black men who are like this; because it seems like men of other races that date black women do the same crap that they claim black men do. Like I said before, it’s because black women want to be in damn CONTROL. Period. Then, they start complaining when the load becomes more than they can handle. Now, all of a sudden, they want their sissified man to step up to the plate and handle business. Sorry, things don’t work that way. If you want men to be PATRIARCHAL, then RAISE THEM THAT WAY.
He also said something else that really tripped me out as well. He said, that when black women are married to white men, they won’t leave these men no matter how WORTHLESS they prove themselves to be. Yet, he went on to say, that when it comes to black men; however, many black women will leave a nigga at the drop of a damn dime. It’s the truth too. There are very few black women out here who are willing to stick with a black man through the roughest of times; simply because they feel like you aren’t worth the damn effort.
I always hear black women talk about how black women and white men have the lowest divorce rates, and all of that other garbage. However, what they don’t tell you is that the reason why this is the case is because black women won’t leave a damn white man for all the gold in “Scrooge McDuck’s” treasure chest in “Duck Tales”. They will stay with these men through thick and then simply because many of them think that being with white men is the end-all, be-all. To be with anything less, is a step down in the eyes of many black women. Especially, black men.
What trips me out about many black women, is that they always push the good side of dating inter-racially. However, they NEVER talk about the downside of it. They give many black women out here a false illusion of non-black men. Then, when many of these women find out that non-black men are no better than black men, they keep silent due to EMBARRASSMENT. Many of them just stand back and TAKE whatever their non-black spouse is dishing out to them due to PRIDE. They can’t go back to looking black men’s way again after the way many of them have literally SWORN themselves off of black men. Hell, to many of them, even the worst treatment from non-black men is better than being with a nigga again.
Honestly, I am glad that many of them don’t try to come back to black men, because what black man really wants a black woman like that anyway? I know that I sure as hell wouldn’t. He wouldn’t be getting a prize, but a woman who is completely used-up, and dogged the hell out. A REFORMED woman is no prize at all. Especially, not to a black man who is a good guy. They deserve better.
He and I also went on to discuss the inherent DISRESPECT that many black women have for black men out here. There simply is no getting around it. A lot of black women simply don’t respect black men PERIOD; and this is regardless of how good, or bad he is. Many of them refuse to respect black men simply because they are ARE BLACK MEN. There is very little difference in how this society views black men and how many black women view them. I have been on the receiving end of that disrespect far too many times in my damn life. From being blatantly insulted out in the public, to being disrespected at places of business. Many black women simply feel that a black man is not worthy of their respect or common-courtesy.
That’s the main reason why their relationships last when they are with other men; because many of them go all out for non-black men. They treat being with these men as if they have discovered some rare jewel that they may never find again. Whereas, when it comes to black men, many black women take black men completely for granted; treating black men as if they are as worthless as piece of gum on the bottom of somebody’s shoe.
That is all.